I think I am isolating this winter. I mean to go out and sometimes do. I almost always learn something new. People are nice. I talk to people about nothing more than superficial things. (With the exception of when I go out with just one person and am able to talk about meaningful things and philosophize and speculate) But mostly, it is not relaxing or truly satisfying to me. Yes. I can make jokes and ask good questions...so what is it?
Especially for night time meetings...when I know I have one, I dread it all day. I nap all afternoon and go get a Starbucks Mocha and wake up all over again just to be marginally delightful. And alert. Still, I yawn by 8 pm.
By contrast, I am alert all morning. Love running the dogs and getting things done. I nap every afternoon-or maybe I meditate too. I love the company of grandkids. They are not the least bit boring and they like to talk about their ideas and feelings.
Is this just getting older? Is my thyroid problem coming back? I should really say my half thyroid.
I have noticed that everyone I know over age 60 has some sort of problem, physical or mental or both and most people I know are on anti-depressants. Currently I am only taking aspirin or Tylenol when my hands or body ache. As a secret scientist, I need to find a baseline.
Sometimes old friends get real grumpy. Maybe they hurt in ways I don't know. Maybe it is age.
OR maybe, we are not cut out for the demands (and suggestions) for the 21st century. Maybe my physical body was better equipped for 1900. Maybe my mind too!
I first heard about this book on NPR. "Quiet- The Power of Introverts in a World That can't Stop Talking" by Susan Cain. Bought it. Gonna read it.